I’ll Die If I Have To!
A Thought on Sunday
I’ll Die If I Have To!
Sunday, March 2nd 2014
This is little Cara Curley. She died on Dec. 31, 2013. Even if I had the space, I could not add anything to her heart breaking and inspiring account:
Hi, I’m Cara Curley. I’m aged 8. I was born on 2nd. June 2005. I live with my family in Taughmaconnell (near Ballinasloe). I love my daddy, he’s funny and tells great stories. I love my mammy, she gives great hugs, buys nice dresses and we do baking together. I love Roisin and Grainne, sometimes we fight but who cares? We love each other anyway.
I love Irish dancing and athletics. I won junior athletics person of the year last year, go me, go me. I love One Direction, Harry is my favourite. I love Fr. Ted. Mammy says my language is not that good and blames Fr. Ted but I don’t care. I got to meet Fr. Dougal. He told me he had a dog that was stupid. I said to him. ‘You’re stupid’ and he thought that was funny. I love my Uncle Gerry, he’s great fun, we text each other the whole time about Fr. Ted stuff and things, that’s great fun. I love my Aunt Noreen, she’s good at art, so am I. I won a prize in the Credit Union art competition in November.
I got cancer this year before my communion and that’s not good. I knew it was bad because even Roisin and Grainne were being nice to me. I was sick on the day of my communion and afterwards my Principal and Ms. White came to my house for a visit. They’re teachers so that’s just wrong coming to my house but they brought some cake so that’s ok. Ms. Castles comes to my house to teach me, I call her Nicola sometimes and she pretends to be cross but I know she’s not. I like M’s Castles.
I had to go to hospital. I was worried I might not get better but I didn’t let mammy and daddy know because I didn’t want them to be sad. I had a bone marrow transplant but that didn’t work anyway. I asked what would happen when I heard the cancer was back and I thought they might say, ‘Don’t be silly, you’ll be fine’ but they didn’t!’ When I found out I was going to die I was very angry. I wanted to grow up, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to be a designer, I wanted to get married and have kids, but that’s not going to happen now anyway and I didn’t even get to spend my communion money. I did my will that evening. I asked daddy for a pen and paper. I gave the will to daddy when I was done. We got home from Crumlin and put up the Christmas tree, I helped. Grainne told me not to walk under the ladder because that was bad luck. I said ‘who cares? I have leukemia, I’m going to die anyway; you can’t get much worse luck than that’. The doctor came to the house. He said ‘Any pain, Cara?’ I said, ‘No, have you?’ He thought that was funny. Lots of nurses come to the house as well, they are all women, wouldn’t it be nice if they sent a few good looking lads instead. But I’ll die if I have to. I’ll meet Hughie and Mammy’s daddy and talk about stuff. I’m not that sad now because I know I’ll always be in your heads and your hearts. Bye for now, see you all again. Love Cara. XXX